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#FreebieFriday

So today is Friday, and I know I already posted a guest blogger BUT I wanted to hand out a freebie that I made for ya’ll to print and hang up as you wish. I love chicken and waffles, and SO many other people have their own interpretation of what chicken and waffles is to them so I decided to make something for all you lovers of chicken and waffles out there!

Here’s a smaller preview of the image, but you can download it here from my Google Drive for the larger version to print and frame for your home. I’ve made multiple images for you with different colors so you can express yourself.

Have fun and if you download it and hang it up, send me a photo in the comments so I can showcase them!

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Hello

Hello,
It’s been awhile, hasn’t it? Welcome back to the world. It seems you’ve been missing for some time now and it just isn’t the same without you. Since you’ve left, there’s been numerous disasters including nuclear invasion and wars across the nation that could have used your help. But you were too busy, weren’t you? Too busy floating out there in space to give a care about your home. Too busy doing who knows with whoever will give you the time of day. Do you think it’s easy to save a planet without its hero? Do you think it’s easy – day to day life knowing that there is no one there to rescue you if something goes wrong? 

We constantly live in fear because our world’s hero has gone missing.

But it’s okay – you’re back now, right? You’re here to stay? I should hope you would be. 1300 years gone with no one to care about us and all of a sudden the prodigal child of the Gods has returned without any notion of where he went and what he did this whole time? Please tell me how that makes sense. Tell me that you’ve been caught up in another world caring for their people and not just running away and hiding from everyone and everything. Tell me that you ran into some issues and had to defeat the monster that is the government on another planet and straighten them out before returning to us. Tell me that everything was okay for you and that you never did forget about us. We’ve missed the hero of our world. Was there another world so much better than ours that you decided to leave and not help us?

This nuclear fusion needs you. We need you. We can’t win this one without you anymore. We are burning and drowning at the same time. We tried calling out for help, but for 700 years with no such luck and our hero gone, we had no choice but to give up all hope and try to trust in each other. We are at war because we trusted in ourselves as a nation. 

Was this a lesson? 

Was this your way of telling your people that we need to be sufficient in our own actions and that you can’t – and won’t – be there all the time to help us? If this was a lesson or a test, well played. But now your people are dying. More than half of your world is gone, and you have the audacity to return and show no remorse? 

What ails our hero? 

What happened out there?

 

My Life In 5 Years

Picture it: Huge cactus next to the back porch, dirt for a driveway. Over-hang on the front of the door with an attractive bistro table set up. Community pool staring you in the face every day as you sit in the front of your house. You wander inside for a mixed drink from your mini bar that you made the night before and had extra of. Grab your favorite book and wide brimmed hat and head back outside to wait for your friend to get home. Putting your headphones in, you get a call from someone back home wondering how you are, and where you’ve gone. You tell them not to worry and that you’re living your life to the fullest where you should have been in the first place. You tell them that they should make a journey to visit or that they should get with the times and video chat you so you can show them everything you’ve accomplished the last few years. You tell them, “Sometimes you need to leave everything behind to start the next chapter in your life to experience new horizons.” It’s been a few years since you’ve been back home, and part of you feels no repentance for leaving everything you left behind. While you miss your family and friends back there, especially your mother and grandparents, there’s no other way you’d have wanted to spend your early 30’s than adventuring out west.

Cut back to a few years ago at 27 Years Old – you decide to tell everyone that you’re out. Done and gone with everything and everyone on the east coast and are in search of adventure. You’re in search of a job you love and a place you can call home. It’s the end of the summer and you’re not ready for it to be cold again over in the PA Mountains. You just want dirt and sun and some Death Valley vibes. You’re determined to do this on your own, and if anyone should follow, then you’ll at least have some company. At the time of commencement, you’ve found no one to adventure with you, but you’re still determined to leave it all behind and go forth with the new adventure that is your life. Different climate, different time zone and different people all around you. Maybe you’ll meet someone great out there and learn to grow as a person. But of course, these are all maybes, as this is never guaranteed.

You’ll throw everything out you own and make everything new when you get out there. Your mom will fly out there to meet you with your precious kitties so they too can have a better life. They wouldn’t like the car ride, and you’ll have to take your car out there with you, of course – so you can get to your new job as an Internet Brand Ambassador. The only thing you’d need to send out there for certain is the mattress you have that you love so much. If IKEA is a thing out there, that I’ve now confirmed that there is one out there, that’s where you’ll go to revamp everything in the apartment, including a mini bar for wine like you’ve always wanted.

Things can only go up from here, right? You’ve put up with so much the last few years – from dating someone who you almost firmly believe is gay, to moving all around and being stood up by people who you thought were your friends and now staying at a job you hate because you need to be able to afford to live and have a place to call home. When do things get better? When do things get easier for someone who struggles daily? When is your break? Your break comes when you are ready. Your break comes when you stand up and tell yourself you’ve had enough and you need a change. Break up with that person who wasn’t making you happy. Worry about yourself and not what others do. If they don’t give you the time of day – they’re not your friend and never were to begin with. Get rid of those folks in your life that don’t benefit you in every single way that you need them to. You’re who matters in this life, not anyone else that is not beneficial to your life. It’s time to do you – and it’s time to move to a new location, with new everything to start over. Every now and then it just has to be done. 

Time with yourself is the most treasured time there is – and that time is now. 

XOXOX

Koral Dawn

Illusion; At The End of Days.

Everyone has hopes;  you’re human after all.

This feeling is not sadness; this feeling is not joy. I truly understand, please don’t cry now.

Please don’t go, I want you to stay. I’m begging you please, please don’t leave here.

I don’t want you to change; for all the hurt that you feel.

The world is just illusion; trying to change you.

I’m sitting at Barnes and Nobles right now, at 8 pm at night on a Thursday and I’ll probably be here tomorrow night as well since I now have nothing to do ever anymore. This holiday season took a toll on me, and I’m not ashamed to say that. Sometimes life gets the best of you. I’ve relapsed. I don’t want to relapse. It’s the same things every time. And something needs to change with my life. I’m just not sure what that change is yet.

As I sit here, listening to VNV Nation and the Babelsberg Film Orchestra; it makes me wonder. It makes me think. What did I possibly do wrong? What about my imperfect life could I possibly have done wrong to drive away the one I love yet again? Maybe it just wasn’t meant to be anymore? Maybe I was the only one willing to put up a fight to stay happy and try to hold everything together for a second maybe third try? I don’t know why this keeps happening to me all the time. Maybe this was a lesson to me in what I’ve been doing wrong? I don’t know.

I don’t regret the choices I have made. These are feelings that do not pass so easily. How can I forget; what we’ve claimed as ours? Moments lost, as time remains. I’m so proud of what we were. No pain remains, no feelings; eternity awaits. Grant me wings so I may fly. My beloved, do you know; when the warm wind comes again; another year will start to pass. And please don’t ask me why I’m here; something deeper brought me that I need to remember. My beloved, do you know; how many years I’ve stared at clouds, thinking that I saw you there? These are feelings that do not pass so easily; how can I forget what we’ve claimed as ours?

I think it got to the point where I just wasn’t happy but I was trying because I was so happy and content with my life and how it was going to end up. If given the proper chance, I will take it and I will give you another shot to prove yourself. If that’s not enough, then it’s not enough. I have paid my dues and I have been here for you this whole time. Maybe you might not have realized it, and maybe you just don’t want to realize it. But I have always been there.  I have always asked “How was your day?” When I know you’ve had a terrible day and you might want to talk about it. I’ve always made sure you felt wanted and needed by me. I have taken the time to craft envelopes for you to open in everyday life situations and you ignored them. I’ve always cleaned for you because I know you hate it; even thought I hated it as well. I did these things for you, and I wouldn’t change a thing about it.

I’m sorry you weren’t happy like I was. Nothing was done wrong on either or our ends. It got to the point where my love, just wasn’t enough for you, or maybe it was too much for you and you didn’t want it anymore. It got to the point to where whenever I saw you I wasn’t happy. I admit it. And I missed that. I guess it got to the point to where it was.. almost a requirement to see you on certain days because you made it so. You made it like that and I’m sorry I agreed to it. We should see each other when we want and how often we wanted if there was truly love and a spark there anymore. I didn’t feel it half the time towards the end, and I’m sorry to admit that. I wanted to feel it. I tried to feel it. But I most definitely agree there needed to be a break to be able to miss each other again. I want to miss you. I want to look forward to seeing you, and I want to look forward to doing the things we used to when the connection was seamless.  There is nothing wrong with me. There is nothing wrong with you.

I’m not afraid anymore. I’m not senseless. And I will let the pain inside me die; eventually. My life was full of us, and so much of us, maybe I lost myself. I wasn’t the happy go lucky girl anymore that I was when we hung out as friends and in the beginning of the relationship the second time around. I know that now – I feel different. I’m sad now, but that’s because I feel like I’ve broken everything but I haven’t. We both did. You did by not wanting to work on anything and ignoring me and what we had, and I did by trying too much to fix what we had.

Something needs to change, and I’m not quite sure what that is yet to be honest. Just… something. Whether I need to move and distance myself away from this area because everywhere I go reminds me of us… or whether it’s just finding something different to be passionate about. I honestly don’t know. I just know that since this my anxiety is through the roof and something needs to be done about that first before I can make any firm decisions. I have a feeling this is where everything stems from and I will be a lot happier in life if I got help with the anxiety and depression I deal with from time to time. I’m finally admitting I need some help, and maybe even medication to help ease the anxiety pain. That’s first on my list now. I have to take care of me, and everything and everyone else; can wait. 

Lay me down, and wash this world from me. No moment was made to last. There are better days to come. Who will be there; to remember who we were? Who will be there to know that any of this had meaning for us? The sun was born; so it shall die. Only shadows now comfort me. I know in darkness, I will find you; giving up inside like me. Each day shall end as it begins. And though you’re far away from me; I know in darkness I will find you; giving up inside like me. I will forget that we were once dust from heaven. As were forged, we shall return; perhaps someday. I will remember us, and I will wonder who we were.

Should they include you, I’m not sure yet, that’s not for me alone to decide. Answers will come in time, and when they do come, please let them be clear. My love for us will never be forgotten; and I will always miss it.

The Foam at The Top

So I took some new pictures recently at Georgetown Deli and Beer Store in Wilkes Barre, PA and wanted to share them with you.

Who doesn’t like a good brew some days? Everyone needs something after a long week of work and losing an hour of sleep today. I was able to go to King of Prussia this weekend and IKEA to get some new things for the apartment next door that I needed and we stopped at the Rock Bottom Brewery as well and that place was probably the best place I have been for food in a very long time – lunch was also only $30 for two people and food and drinks. That’s perfect. It sucks we’re not closer to the place, but for now we’ll make it a point to go down there whenever we go to IKEA or KOP Mall.

Overall, this weekend was awesome and I was able to get a few things I wanted at IKEA. Not all of it unfortunately, but I’ll be going back in like a month to get the wardrobe I need for my room so I’m excited for that. It wouldn’t fit in my car. I need a bigger car. I’m tempted to get a larger car next year if I’m able to save up a little bit and can trade mine in also. Im thinking small SUV or jeep or something like that. Nothing “mom” though. I hate that. I don’t plan on kids so I don’t want a “mom car” at all. Just something larger and classier and so I can fit more stuff in.

Anyway, off to sleep early tonight. I lost an hour of sleep and didn’t get to sleep until 4am this morning and I regret it majorly. I’m so tired.

More later.

Cheers,

xoxox

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10 Pillows, 3 Blankets and A Cold Empty Bed.

It’s 12:30 in the morning and I can’t sleep again. It’s been a crazy week, and very long at that. I think I need to majorly work tomorrow so I can add some hours to my time sheet and make more money. Need to save in case I don’t have a job come November 1.
I don’t want to go home to NJ. I really don’t. I need someone to hire me and have a normal 9-5 job like everyone else does so I can still have a social life. That’s all I want. I’m happy in an administrative position. As long as it’s not retail I think I’ll be okay. I can’t do that anymore.

I decided to leave Verizon. I wasn’t learning the new things to keep up and I was only working 1 day a week. I didn’t want to have to wait an extra week for commission to happen every month when I was able to earn it, that’s not how you do business at all. When an amount is owed to you on a certain date, then it’s owed to you that date. I think it’s for the best anyway. I have my weekends now to work more and have play time again.

The title of this blog seems fitting right now, I have about 10 pillows on my bed, a cat and 3 blankets. With no one to hold or cuddle me at all. I haven’t had a good cuddle in so long, I’m starting to forget what it really is even. I just want someone to wrap their arms around me and keep me warm at night sometimes. Is that too much to ask for anymore? I guess so, since it’s been maybe a year I got some actual cuddles or something. Maybe I should hire someone to do that for me. I’ll pay in cookies or brownies.. think that’ll work? Probably not.

I guess I’m just lonely. Been working alot and not seeing anyone except like 3 people. We haven’t done Arena in about 2 weeks, and I don’t know why. I guess they’re sick of me? Who knows anymore. I think I try too hard to be nice and the good person… lol. All it does is get me shit these days. Sometimes I just wish my efforts went appreciated and acknowledged.

Anyway. Here’s some new photos I took with my phone.

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Photo of The Day March 03, 2015

Good evening, all!
Haven’t written in 2 weeks and I’d like to share a photo with you from today.

I decided to make Apple Crisp again and bought a new crock pot (a smaller one than last time, and that ones gone for reasons… But yes!) It didn’t come out as good as the last times because I think it was a different recipe (sad face.)

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Adorable little slow cooker!

There’s nothing new to report here on any other end. I’ve been watching the Avengers every night in bed. “Let me know if real power would like a magazine or something.” I love Loki. He is God. 😀

I hate winter, for the record. Its all snowy and icy out and I’ve been inside all day and I’m glad. I want summer already. Please??

Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans. –John Lennon

Cheers!
xoxox
||Koral Dawn||

Mid Week Random Thoughts

Greetings friends!

I’ve been up a long time today because I couldn’t sleep last night. I’ve been listening to New Medicine and We Are Harlot alot today (and bands of the like) and I’ve been in a decent mood.

New Medicine is a different type of band than I normally listen to. But I’m glad I’ve found them. They’re definitely interesting.

Today’s Wednesday and there’s not much to say except work seemed to take forever today. We starred a new time study for the work day, and I have to try and transfer everything to a new template tomorrow if I have time. And I just plain don’t wanna. I wish we were allowed to do OT whenever we wanted to like my mom can. I’d be working from home all the time because I could use the money. I hope this new template goes smoother than todays. Even though I made mine super pretty and easier to read. (Well, to me it’s easier, my coworker looked at me like I was insane when she saw it..)
I don’t normally post these, but here, have a selfie I took today:

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I was able to get Dunkin this morning because I needed a wake up. The new white chocolate raspberry is pretty awesome to be honest. I don’t normally like iced coffee but this one and the cookie dough kind they had in summer are amazing. Sadly they stopped the cookie dough one.. they better bring it back this year.
I’m watching Pain and Gain in bed again before bed. I feel lazy, as always. I’ve got no inspiration lately and there’s things I have to do still for a friend and everything just escapes me. That’s what happens when you get home at 6pm from work and then don’t even have dinner till 9 because you have to clean. Such is life and responsibilities though so… can’t really complain, atleast I was able to eat tonight a little.

Anyway, I should sleep. I have to be up at 615 am for work. Well, 630 but the alarm goes off at 615 so I can procrastinate.. as do so many people I know.

“I don’t believe in guilty pleasures, you know. I believe you should be able to like what you like, if you like a fucking Ke$ha song, listen to fucking Ke$ha.” -Dave Grohl

Cheers!
xoxox

||Koral♡Dawn||