to do | Virtually Yours, Koral Dawn

Stress

The holidays have a large amount of stress. Whether it is worry, overeating, being tired, not sleeping, or mood swings – everyone has some amount of stress. We need to manage this stress in a way that we can control. So, here are some great ideas in order to make this the best holiday season yet!

Realistic Expectations Our culture makes the holiday season into a joyous occasion. However, sometimes it doesn’t feel that way. The holidays shows (and I admit I am a Hallmark movie junkie) portray an illusion that is not real life. Go into the season with an expectation that it will fulfill. If you think this is a bad year because of loss of love, or sadness, don’t think this will be the best year you have. Be kind to yourself and the idea of what the holiday brings. It is ok if you just survive this time of year.

Do not do more than you can handle You do not have to be the one in charge. You do not have to be the one who cooks 3 dozen cookies. You don’t have to give gifts to everyone you have ever met. If you can’t bring yourself to decorate over the top – do not do it! Don’t volunteer for everything this season. Take care to only do what you think is appropriate. Saying no is really saying yes to yourself and your sanity. I like to answer, “No thanks. I’m sure someone else would love the opportunity.” You do not have to give an explanation to anyone about your choices. You control you.

Make a List of What is Important If you take the time to make a list of what you want to accomplish this holiday season – do that and stick to the list. This list should not be one that overwhelms you. If it contains only a few items of what you need to do – stick to that.

Don’t Compare It is so difficult to compare your life to those around you – especially with all the social media. Do not compare your life to someone else’s. You never know what they are experiencing on a daily basis. Don’t feel bad because the photos seem perfect – the fact is that is not how life is. Life is messy.

Spread some cheer If you have the time, it is a great time to volunteer. Or mail a letter to a friend who helped you. Drop off a small gift to a surprise house. Donate a toy to the children’s hospital. Drop off cat food at your local shelter. Do what is easy but it will make you feel better. I love anonymous donations. Or pay for the car behind you in a drive thru. Or just smile at those around you. Smiling will already make you feel better. Spread love all around you.

Support If you need support, get it. There is no shame in talking to someone – whether it is a counselor or life coach or friend. Talk to someone and get the understanding and compassion for what you need. Take care of yourself.

Make Time for Yourself You know I mentioned Hallmark movies earlier? I love them and usually watch them in my alone time for the holidays. Take a bath or take a walk on your own. Do what makes you happy and plan for that time. Being divorced, I have more alone time than I usually want – but I fill that in on things that I enjoy. Get a manicure if it makes you feel better.

Create New Memories If it is a new season in your life – maybe you want to create a different memories. Some old memories are sad. So, start a new one. Start a hot chocolate and talk event. Go caroling. Go out and see Christmas lights and vote on which you like best – we like to leave a gift of a chocolate bar and a note – you are the winner of the lights! – for fun. Go enjoy something new.

Here’s to the Best Holiday Season Yet!!!

Big thank you to Erin for sending over this blog for me to feature about holiday stress! It’s always great working with new people and helping each other out, especially around this time of year. Look for my blog featured on hers as well about your Sunday Morning Classic Rock Playlist. If interested in guest blogging in the future with me, please email me on my contact me page, or visit my Instagram and send me a DM. Thanks!

I’ve come to realize that I’ll be 25 in less than 2 months… And I haven’t done enough of these.
Who is going to help me do these that I have left (the ones that require people at least…)

1. Make peace with your parents. Whether you finally recognize that they actually have your best interests in mind or you forgive them for being flawed human beings, you can’t happily enter adulthood with that familial brand of resentment.

2. Kiss someone you think is out of your league; kiss models and med students and entrepreneurs with part-time lives in Dubai and don’t worry about if they’re going to call you afterward.

3. Minimize your passivity.

~~4. Work a service job to gain some understanding of how tipping works, how to keep your cool around assholes, how a few kind words can change someone’s day.~~

~~5. Recognize freedom as a 5:30 a.m. trip to the diner with a bunch of strangers you’ve just met.~~

6. Try not to beat yourself up over having obtained a ‘useless’ Bachelor’s Degree. Debt is hell, and things didn’t pan out quite like you expected, but you did get to go to college, and having a degree isn’t the worst thing in the world to have. We will figure this mess out, I think, probably; the point is you’re not worth less just because there hasn’t been an immediate pay off for going to school. Be patient, work with what you have, and remember that a lot of us are in this together.

7. If you’re employed in any capacity, open a savings account. You never know when you might be unemployed or in desperate need of getting away for a few days. Even $10 a week is $520 more a year than you would’ve had otherwise.

~~8. Make a habit of going outside, enjoying the light, relearning your friends, forgetting the internet.~~

9. Go on a 4-day, brunch-fueled bender.

10. Start a relationship with your crush by telling them that you want them. Directly. Like, look them in the face and say it to them. Say, I want you. I want to be with you.

11. Learn to say ‘no’ — to yourself. Don’t keep wearing high heels if you hate them; don’t keep smoking if you’re disgusted by the way you smell the morning after; stop wasting entire days on your couch if you’re going to complain about missing the sun.

12. Take time to revisit the places that made you who you are: the apartment you grew up in, your middle school, your hometown. These places may or may not be here forever; you definitely won’t be.

13. Find a hobby that makes being alone feel lovely and empowering and like something to look forward to.

~~14. Think you know yourself until you meet someone better than you.~~

15. Forget who you are, what your priorities are, and how a person should be.

16. Identify your fears and instead of letting them dictate your every move, find and talk to people who have overcome them. Don’t settle for experiencing .000002% of what the world has to offer because you’re afraid of getting on a plane.

17. Make a habit of cleaning up and letting go. Just because it fit at one point doesn’t mean you need to keep it forever — whether ‘it’ is your favorite pair of pants or your ex.

18. Stop hating yourself.

19. Go out and watch that movie, read that book, listen to that band you already lied about watching, reading, listening to.

~~20. Take advantage of health insurance while you have it.~~

21. Make a habit of telling people how you feel, whether it means writing a gushing fan-girl email to someone whose work you love or telling your boss why you deserve a raise.

~~22. Date someone who says, “I love you” first.~~

23. Leave the country under the premise of “finding yourself.” This will be unsuccessful. Places do not change people. Instead, do a lot of solo drinking, read a lot of books, have sex in dirty hostels, and come home when you start to miss it.

~~24. Suck it up and buy a Macbook Pro.~~

25. Quit that job that’s making you miserable, end the relationship that makes you act like a lunatic, lose the friend whose sole purpose in life is making you feel like you’re perpetually on the verge of vomiting. You’re young, you’re resilient, there are other jobs and relationships and friends if you’re patient and open.

Source: Lexietomtom.tumblr.com

Number 23 might be a little hard to do in 2 months… But that will be done by the time I’m 30 then.

More later, of course.

Cheers,
xoxox

||KoralDawn||

Virtually Yours, Koral Dawn

I work hard so my cats can have tuna

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